The "Why?" Phase

Lights up on a little girl sitting at
A table with her mother, eating
Dinner. She looks at her plate
With a puzzled look.

Girl

Mommy?

Mother

Yes?

Girl

Why are these plates round? Why can't they be square?

Mother

They make square plates, honey. We just don't buy them.

Girl

Why?

Mother

Because. We just don't buy them.

Girl

But why?

Mother

Because I like the round plates.

Girl

... Why?

Mother sighs. Lights down

Roger and Karen

Counseling

Lights up on Roger and Karen. they are in

the therapist's office. they both look angry.

Therapist

Roger... What made you want a divorce in the first place if you don't want one now?

Roger

Karen knows what she did with Ricardo. She knows why I burned the Twister mat.

Karen

No, Roger! You know what YOU did with Vicky! She's my sister!

Roger

Well, in that case, your sister is better at Twister than you.

Karen

You know what, Roger? Ricardo is better at Twister than you.

Roger

Vicky showed me that video, Karen. Why would you do that on camera?

Karen

It was an AUDITION tape, Roger!

Roger

Audition for WHAT, Karen?!

Therapist

OKAY! Everybody calm down. Um... Karen... What kind of video did you make with your... sister?

Karen

Are you JUDGING me?! Oh, bitch, please!

Roger

Don't you judge my domestic partner! I think it was a very entertaining video!

Karen

It was entertaining to make!

Roger and Karen continue arguing. Lights go down

Christmastime

Lights up on a family around a christmas

tree with a bunch of opened presents and

the kids playing with their new toys. Bob

looks exasperated and Helen looks utterly

displeased.

Bob

Helen... would you like to open the present from me and the kids?

Helen (dripping with destain)

Oh, the gift from the dollar store? Why not?

Bob

Helen...

Helen

Kids. Get your presents and go to your rooms.

the kids gather their presents and

follow their mother's orders.

Helen

Bob. We spend hundreds on the kids and I buy you a $150 watch! I bet this gift was handmade because you waited until the last minute.

Bob

Helen, it's the thought that counts so shut the hell up about it.

Helen

I absolutely LOVE the thought, but did it come out of your paycheck? NO.

Helen gets up and leaves.

On her way out...

Helen

Cheap bastard.

Bob

Greedy bitch.

Lights to black.

3-Word Writing Exercise(: dont make fun of my capitalization or punctuation -.-

Characters: George- A man who really likes banana cream pie. Dull, smart. Businessman.
Wilfred- a man who loathes banana cream pie with a burning passion and he is also allergic to it. Sarcastic, smart. Unemployed.

Setting: A local diner.

Conflict: George wants Wilfred to try new things (including banana cream pie) and Wilfred wants George to stop talking about banana cream pie for 5 minutes.

Pie Troubles

Lights come up on George and Wilfred in a diner
George sits down. Wilfred is already sitting down

George

Hey there, Wilfred!

Wilfred

George, it's been-

George

so long, I know.

Wilfred

Well, Thanks for that, George.

George

Thanks for what?

Wilfred

Finishing my sentence.

George

No problem, Wilfred.

Wilfred

Yep. You're such a generous person.

George

I know, thanks for getting my pie. What kind is yours?

Wilfred

a big piece of chocolate pie.

George

why not banana-

Wilfred

don't even say it.

George

Wilfred! Why not!?

Wilfred

Because it's disgusting.

George

DON'T SAY THAT!

Wilfred

I'll say it if I want to.

George

Wilfred! It's just-

Wilfred

Don't say that.

George

It's just a pie.

Wilfred

Just a pie?

George

Yes, Wilfred it's just a pie. Relax.

Wilfred

Whatever, George. Whatever.

George

Just try a tiny little bite.

Wilfred

No, it's gross.

George

It's just pie.

Wilfred

No it's not.

George

Wait are you...

Wilfred

Allergic to bananas? Yes.

George

You really are?!

Wilfred

Yes. Very allergic.

George

You mean, like hives allergic?

Wilfred

It's the can't breathe and then follows by dying allergic.

George

oh... Okay, Wilfred.

Wilfred

Thank you, George.

George

You're welcome, Wilfred.

Wilfred

So... um, How's the family?

George

Really good, Wilfred?

Wilfred

The kids smart?

George

Yes, very much.

Wilfred

Well, Isn't that special?

George

Was that sarcasm?

Wilfred

Most likely, George.

George

Oh... Well then.

Wilfred

Get over it.

George

Okay, I will.

Wilfred

I'm leaving now.

George

Okay. don't get hit by a car.

Wilfred

I'll be careful.

George

Good.

Wilfred leaves. Lights go down